#Paris of troy
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dionysism · 3 months ago
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"if i was paris i'd have picked athena" "i would have picked hera"
you fool. you utter buffoon. it doesn't matter. it never mattered. you sound like the dumbasses who say they wouldn't have turned around if they were orpheus. you, like them, are completely missing the point. the war was always going to happen as a result of who he picked, just perhaps the catalyst would have been different. and does picking a different catalyst really make you any better? lets say you picked hera and her offer of kingdoms. so you doom your nation to ruin for wealth? power? and that, in your mind, is the morally superior choice to dooming it for love? shall we clap and cheer for you? oh wise one so above the fickleness and follies of love! you, unlike paris, would doom your nation for Practical reasons. well, forgive me, but thats incredibly dull and you sound incredibly boring
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deadbaguette · 2 months ago
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Dear children of Priam, were you doomed all along?
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astrothii · 2 months ago
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the whole trojan war could have been avoided if paris just. ate the apple in one comically large bite. athena, hera, and aphrodite would have been stunned into silence.
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orpheus-has-lyreizz · 2 months ago
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AU where paris is just a little less of a dumbass
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ochiody · 1 month ago
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paris in the front btw
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yourlokalescholar · 2 months ago
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Oh my god wait. What if the blessings of the gods manifested physically? Like if a god takes an interest in you, EVERYONE is going to see it, for better or worse. And if you lose their favour? Everyone can see that, too
Jason with a peacock tail and feather-crest, both of which go faded and limp when he turns on Medea, so that they drag on the floor and get in the way
Pollux with eagle wings instead of arms, so Castor acts as his hands and that’s why they’re inseparable. When Castor dies and Pollux splits his immortality with him, they each get one arm and one wing, so one can’t fly without the other
Odysseus with a forked tongue and fangs—a subtle feature that he can hide when he needs to. When Athena feels like being helpful (like when she disguises him as a beggar) she’ll cast an illusion over it, but Penelope immediately recognises him by his lisp
When Athena gives Diomedes the blessing of seeing through the gods’ disguises, he also gets owl eyes and the ability to turn his head 180 degrees. This helps when Odysseus tries to stab him in the back on the Palladium heist
HERACLES WITH BULL HORNS. I have nothing to add I just think that sounds sick as hell
Helen grows beautiful golden feathers instead of hair. Nothing useful, just an obvious sign of her heritage that adds to her appeal to the suitors: whoever wins her hand gets to walk around with a physical symbol of Zeus’s favour
Atalanta with antlers that snap when she gets married, leaving jagged shards behind that won’t go blunt and can’t be sharpened down. She can have her husband, but he can’t touch her head without risking badly cutting himself. This can either be one final blessing or a curse depending on how consensual you interpret the marriage
Hector has pristine white raven wings, making him even more terrifying to the Achaeans, flying into battle like divine intervention, and a symbol of hope for the Trojans. Achilles plucks the feathers off his corpse, but they won’t stop growing back. Still, Achilles has a cloak made from them and wears it into battle, turning Troy’s symbol against them
Paris gets dove wings, but he tells everyone they’re too small to fly with because he’s a coward and doesn’t want to have the same responsibilities as Hector. Then he flies away from the duel with Menelaus in front of the entire army, and that’s when Troy finally loses what’s left of their respect for him
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wolfythewitch · 2 years ago
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Yet think, a day will come, when fate's decree And angry gods shall wreak this wrong on thee; Phoebus and Paris shall avenge my fate, And stretch thee here before the Scaean gate.
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katkit-drops-alt · 8 months ago
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aaaaaaaaaaaa the iliad/odyssey as cat memes aaaaaaaaaaaaa
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maggie44paint · 30 days ago
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Uhhh so I made Menelaus/Helen Iliad Swap AU-
Or as I like to call it Malewife Menelaus AU
Basically everything is the same but Paris kidnaps Menelaus instead of Helen and Helen goes to war to get her husband back!
Nobody dies in the end and they all end up in poly relationship
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meboii27 · 7 months ago
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achilles n his silly actions
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thelesbianthespianposts · 4 months ago
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Pre-Iliad Dashboard simulator
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⬜️ iphy-the-princess-deactivated12990415
Eeeee!!! Guess who’s getting married to swift-footed Achilles??!!!
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💪 bestofgreeks
hurts being the only competent Greek warrior but someone’s gotta do it
#aristos achaeon #suck it agamemnon #im so hot #trojan war
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🪢 ilovemywife
I’m so strong for putting up with the other kings of Greece. #Except my bestie o-my-gods-just-let-me-die-omedes the only real one #if I have to hear agamemnon refuse to acknowledge the gods’ help one more time #he has so much hubris #could never be me
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🖕o-my-gods-just-let-me-die-omedes
why do people find Odysseus charming? He’s literally just lying about everything??
🖕o-my-gods-just-let-me-die-omedes
I get it
#i would legit die for him #hes the best of all of us ok?? 245 notes
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👁️ pleaseimaprophetiswear
PLEASE SOMEONE LISTEN TO ME
🗡️ agamemnon
yes?
👁️ pleaseimaprophetiswear
SOMEBODY ELSE
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👑 prettiest-girl-ever-derogatory
Day 57 in Troy: living my best life, my new “husband” was away today thank the Gods. I heard there’s going to be a war over me. Love the sentiment but it’s a little much y’know?
#my husband is so nice but he’s so dramatic #hes pooled together all the armies in Greece to come together #no hector hate in the reblogs ok? #hes actually pretty ok #we make fun of paris together
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🏹 paris-not-the-city
Ok poll to prove I’m not crazy
No nuance option bc I wasn’t given one
#not my fault #its clearly aphrodite #olympian gods #i didn’t know kidnapping the queen of sparta would have consequences
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✨ queen-clytemnestra
im going to kill my husband. with an axe
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dionysism · 3 months ago
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i love hector paris and cassandra so bad they are one of The sibling trios ever to me like ohhh my loves you are all so doomed. none of you will survive. i love you so much. hector who wants to hate paris so bad because wouldn't it be easier? wouldn't it be so simple? but he can't, of course he can't. and cassandra. cassandra who can see the end and knows no matter how desperately she begs her brothers to listen to her nothing will change. and maybe she even wants to hate them a little for that. but she can't, either. and paris... foolish cowardly paris... never been the son you should be, the brother you should be. but if you have anything its love. too much, maybe. enough to doom a nation. you'll watch your older brother die, and your sister will watch you die, then she'll be taken across the sea to die herself. but the love!! the love i know they all had for eachother gods somebody sedate me
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dacenturion · 29 days ago
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That scene in Book 6 where Paris gathers courage and follows Hector riding into battle. I always thought it was so cute because it’s one of the few scenes where the brothers really show that they care about each other. Paris is like “Let’s go, brother!!” And Hector is like, “sigh…my little bro….”
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Drawing the horses was SO HARD
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justvea18 · 2 months ago
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Hector and Paris sketch while I contemplate my school work
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littlesparklight · 10 months ago
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You stand above your brother in his bed, occupied now by more than just pillows and blankets, for the woman at his back is fair and terrifying, even in sleep. You look between them, and you stand above your brother and think -
Is it too late to kill him now?
There are no ships on the horizon - yet - and if you present a body along with the stolen wife when the husband turns up, will that break the omen your mother dreamed?
Is it too late to kill him now?
You drop your hand down - perhaps to close around his throat, another already clutching one of those many, many pillows, and in the dark it'd be easy, wouldn't it? All you do is caress his cheek, your fingers digging stiffly into the pillow. He exhales, a tender shallow ease of breath, and there is this little smile on his lips.
You stand above your brother in his bed, there are ships on the shore, and you have cursed him for a plague, a bane, a cruelty raised by the Olympian to bring your house down, and -
it's too late to kill him now.
It'd be easy to do it, however. You carry a dagger at your belt even now, having left your own bed. Or you could perhaps stir up one of your other brothers, the city, some of your father's council. The baby was almost killed once, after all; what would it matter if it was realized now? Kin-blood believed to have been spilled is surely no less polluting than it being done in reality. The attempt might only have been in the handing over of a fragile infant into another's hands, handed over into the bosom of a mountain, wild and no place for such a tender little being.
But the mountain had been merciful, and nurtured instead of torn asunder, and now you're standing above your brother in his bed.
It's too late to kill him now, but would anyone blame you, blame anyone at all they might suspect, as much as they hate him, a hatred unsaid? Simmering. You don't know how he walks through the palace, the city, his life and not cower from the knowledge; he can't not know.
Your brother - pretty, soft, laughing, shining - doomed and dooming all of you from the start. What does an infant know of causing death? Your father tried to kill an innocent. Some of your brothers attempted it next, an innocent only wishing to reclaim what he thought belonged to him and them not knowing who the slave they felt so insulted by was.
Perhaps it's only fair he will kill you all, merely by existing, by batting those ridiculous lashes to lure the woman still sleeping at his back out of her home, her marriage, her life, and into yours.
You stand above your brother in his bed, and brush your knuckles down his cheek.
It's too late to kill him now, and no matter that you've cursed him and wished him dead - to his face, to your parents' faces, but never to anyone else's - with every angry word to spit at him there's always this echo of the wide, wide eyes, the trembling hand in yours as you help him up from kneeling next to the altar in your head.
Your little brother, that you failed to protect when he was born. And what are you if you don't protect? It's too late to kill him now, anyway. Was always too late.
You meet the gleaming whites of Helen's gaze in the darkness, watching her smooth her grip on your brother's arm into a stroke. Both of you can feel the relief staining the air as you turn away, pretending like she wasn't ready to help you.
You leave your brother in his bed.
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deadbaguette · 28 days ago
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Oomf gave me the brush pack they use…fell in love with the lining brush and made some doodles
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